I want to live

I want to live. I don't want to end up old with a crusty heart, solidified from my younger years of carousing, largely in pointless fashion and to pass the time. I'm not very old but also not young. At this point, it's clear the world isn't going to naturally provide the environment that I need to live how I want. It's not for the world to do, I know. At least, now I do.

It's up to me. To put myself in that environment. To make that environment. To make decisions and to stay true to them. I want to live how I want and no one is going to make that happen for me.